permanently stuck between ”i really want to talk to you” and “i don’t want to annoy you”
you see, the thing about self esteem is
it doesn’t matter how many people you have supporting you, telling you you’re talented, or attractive, or smart
because in the end, if you truly cannot believe it yourself
or worse, if you depend on those outside forces to confirm positive perceptions of yourself
you still feel pretty shitty
I don’t want to learn in a classroom anymore. I want to travel and talk to people and learn that way. I want to learn as I go, gathering knowledge and not being rigorously tested on it. I don’t want to lose passion in the things I like because of the worry of exams. I want to fueled by snippets of knowledge I gain from people and be inquisitive. School has stolen my passion for the things I’m interested in and I hate it for that.